I Am Not A Christian

A couple of nights ago, on Halloween night, my wife, son and I, as has been our practice every Halloween night ever since we can remember, disconnected our doorbell, turned off the lights, locked all the doors, cleaned up our garage, and made our way to our dinner buffet location. While it is very uncommon these days for any family to refrain from having their kids participate in trick or treating, we decided that that this was something in which we did not wish to participate. That goes against the grain of what society would otherwise preach, and to an extent, even what many Christians may even think. For us, we feel that that night is not honouring to Christ, so for our family, we choose not to participate. I am on the fence about allowing my son to dress up for school, but this year, we decided that dressing up as a fireman, in and of itself was not a bad thing, so we allowed him to put on his fireman outfit. Since I am the one who drops him off and picks him up everyday, I get a chance to interact with several other parents, and a few thought it strange that we weren't allowing him to go out trick or treating. Without getting into a discussion about our spiritual beliefs and convictions, I simply told them that this was not our practice and our choice was go out to dinner as a family. A couple of them said that they respect the fact that we stand for our convictions. One, however, thought that we were depriving our child of something that all the other kids do. "He will feel left out", they said, since "everyone else is doing it." Man, if that didn't get my pulse racing, I don't know what will. I calmly and evenly said to her that "well, this is a great first lesson for him, then, to not simply go with the crowd in life." She nodded and went about her way.

We did explain to our son why we do not celebrate Halloween, and he accepts it and does not make a big deal of it. Honestly, sometimes I think it's the parents who are more of the sh*t disturbers than the kids are. I also wonder how these kids will turn out, having parents who consider societal pressure and expectation as the barometer for how they should raise their kids. *sigh*

On the way to dinner Wednesday night, my wife and I have a discussion in the car, much to the chagrin of our son, who wishes for us to turn up the Transformers 1986 soundtrack CD, with arena rock and all (another indication that left unbiased, children can choose to listen to cheesy 80s Stan Bush music without worry about the antiquated nature of such music). My wife was mentioning to me that she, as part of her daycare practice, brought the kids to an indoor playground a couple times a week, to let the kids let loose, expend energy, and indirectly, give her (and our house) a much needed break from wear and tear. I showed up one time at this indoor playground and notice that errie absence of any male in there. I felt like a sucker that day, surrounded by boundless maternal estrogen (which is clearly different than standard estrogen). It was as if I had just shown up at a lesbian convention. But that is neither here nor there. Anyway, she told me that naturally, the conversation with these other women drifted towards Halloween, and eventually it came out that she did not allow her son to participate, and when she was asked why, she said, "Well, I am a Christian, and I don't celebrate Halloween", and proceeded to outline the reasons. She told me in the car she got funny stares and snickering the rest of the day.

I mentioned to her, by way of some encouragement, that if she gets that kind of reaction, then she is doing her job in witnessing to others. The Bible teaches that followers of Christ will be ridiculed, and possibly even persecuted. That is par for the course, and over time, I have come to accept this as part of my life. That is not to say that we should deliberately go out looking for ways to piss off people; but if, in the course of interaction with non-Christians about our beliefs, we receive a hostile reaction - well, that is just to be expected. The Bible teaches that God's wisdom is considered foolishness to the world, so we shouldn't really be surprised. A few years ago, our home/car, were targeted for Halloween vandals who slashed our tires since it was clear we did not hand out candy on Halloween night. Judging by what I saw the next day, several other people in the community were driving their cars on rims, calling the cops and generally having a miserable November 1 day. I know several other Christian families who were targeted, who do not celebrate Halloween. The cops seemed to indicate afterwards that this happens occasionally where hooligans (usually teenagers or older) decide to mete out their justice for those who do not succumb to pressure to participate in trick or treating. Since then, we have parked our car in the garage every Halloween night, and I have now been regularly scouting our premises late at night, after my wife and son went to sleep. Sounds like an isolated incident that year, but it was sure annoying.

My wife brought up an exceptionally good point, and one that framed the conversation for the rest of the car ride, and has caused an expediting of a world view shift that I've been slowly developing in my own mind. And this may prove controversial, but I believe that there is much truth in the fact that anyone using the term "Christian" to describe themselves, will automatically be lumped into the same camp as televangelists, hypocritical child molesters in churches, closet homosexuals who rant against legalizing homosexuality, and two-faced individuals who lead an otherwise "holy lives" on Sunday mornings, but the other six days of the week are engaged in anything by Godly behaviour. You know who I am talking about - the couple or family who always smiles on in public, and you never see them make mistakes - generally, these folks have the most to hide. This is not an indictment on Christians at all, but simply acknowledging that there is a negative stigma attached to the word "Christian". Now, you may say that I am contradicting myself here, in that I am saying that we should expect persecution, yet we should not carry the label. Personally, I am starting to think calling oneself a Christian comes with some serious issues. For one, does one really need to say it? As my wife and I agreed, it is far better (and in my view, more in line with Scripture) to show that you are a Christian by the way you live. The Bible says "they will know that you are Christians by your love". In other words, your faith is demonstrable; it need not be accompanied by a self-declaration of a label. Augustine once remarked that the gospel should be preached at all times; use words only when necessary. I think there is much truth in all that. Notice that in Jesus' ministry, He referred to Himself in many ways, most of which were metaphorical. He never went around saying, "Look at me! I am God's Son! I am all powerful! I am sinless!" He didn't need to say much. His actions said it all, as did His consistent life practice.

As I delved into this further that evening as I was trying to sleep, I thought about several other reasons why having the label is not a good thing. For one, it creates unrealistic expectations. Like it or not, the overtly "Christiany" Flanders family on The Simpsons TV show accurately depicts, in my view, people's view of Christians. They expect Christians to have it all together, to not use foul language, get angry, make mistakes, etc. While these are in and of themselves good aspects of one's life to strive towards, in pursuit of holiness living, how far it is from the truth, for anyone who has lived the Christian life. The book of Romans talks about the Christian struggling with temptation, sinning when we don't want to sin. The followers of Christ, His original disciples had many personal and character issues. But thank goodness God still manages to find some way to use imperfect people for His purposes and for His glory.

The next thought that I may be a bit harsh, but I'll say it anyway. I personally would refrain from using the Christian name to describe myself, since it conjures up way too much denominational baggage. No one really views a Christian as a "follower of Christ", as it was originally intended. People view Christians as denominationally fundamentalist "shove my beliefs down your throat" types, Roman Catholic (with all the rote, robotic, and oftentimes unbiblical practices that go with following the pope), or unintellectual and unthinking spiritually emotional hippie types who refuse medical attention, exclusively homeschool their kids and avoid contact with the outside world, spending all their time putting their hope in rapture theology that is biblically unsound, at best.

All this equally applies to the ever-growing practice of putting Christian fish symbols, stickers, decals and such on one's car and belongings. I don't begrudge anyone doing so, but I personally won't wear "What Would Jesus Do" armbands, underwear or neckties, since I know that I fall short of what I should be doing many times, and I'd rather not drag the name of Christ into the mud with me.

Why does it matter what people think? It doesn't. But the problem is, you are trying to witness the Gospel of Jesus Christ to someone, and by using the term Christian, you are already erecting a wall of unfounded (but sometimes founded) expectations which makes it harder to share the gospel with someone. Don't get me wrong - I am not against using the term Christian - but I don't think it is necessary. Practice what you preach, and show people that Christians can be real people with real feelings and you know what - we make mistakes too - I think this will go a long way in sharing Biblical truth with them rather than some presumed dogmatic theology that is devoid of any real joy and spiritual fervor. I think if people see how you act and behave, they will eventually draw conclusions about why you are different. They may even guess that you are a Christian when they see you are a real person who makes mistakes, who just happens to have joy and love in your heart, who practices kindness when you don't need to, who practices forgiveness when you don't feel like it, who turns the other cheek when wronged, and who will love others when they laugh at you for being a Christian.